Underedited Cookie

We also discussed my options for the permanent solution I've been dreaming of for more than 15 years. When I kiss I think about it. It's there and I'm hating it. And how do I break the news to potential boyfriends? I'm feeling extremely low today. I guess we do spend too much time together and he doesn't get enough time alone. I'm beginning to think I am not an optimist after all. I don't like people being in love with me. I'll sit and think some more and then when I've thunk enough, I'll not do anything.


Landlord got home last night and worked on his bike. I'm not sure how to feel. When you are very young, seeing your mother in ANY kind of discomfort is extremely distressing. When I wrote that blog entry, all I could see was the devastation I felt, I was just in free-fall and when things are like that, you cannot focus, you cannot decide what is important and what is just being emotional, what is relevant, what is irrelevant. Can I visit him in S. America? Does he want me to support him financially when he gets back until he finds a job?


Whenever we've been out on our bikes, the elation is immense and when I say "I really enjoyed that cycle ride" he is never quite sure I'm being serious. I don't really know where to start. Take this weekend. I went to sleep easily and in good mood but I woke up in the night and my tooth was agony. I decided I was going to keep looking for trousers until I find a pair that fit. I wrote of Noam Chomsky and Nim Chimpsky (the former a philosopher and professor of linguistics, the latter a laboratory chimp taught sign language).


I didn't mention him in my essay but I remember my dog was very good with language. Or maybe my eyes are like saucers. So why was I nervous? I enjoyed the starters, I really enjoyed the crispy duck but by the main course the whole thing was getting tedious. And this is why, dear reader, I went swimming on Tuesday for the first time in years and I didn't die of shame, after all.


Gorgeous Landlord was out last night. I was riding his spare touring bike. Now I can't say whether he is innocent or whether he is guilty, but I have to say I'm not surprised, given where he's chosen to live. I think he fails to understand that blogs, being so personal are probably THE best way of getting to know people.


Oh dear, I keep writing these blog entries that don't go anywhere and are just a stream of consciousness. I wish I knew what my point was before I started.

22.4.06 05:54
 


To date 26 Comment(s)     TrackBack-URL


(16.5.06 15:16)
That's your worst attempt yet. Still, at least Cookie can't take offence - there's no point to what you've written. and what blog isn't a stream of consciousness effort anyway?


(16.5.06 15:21)
Wow. Well, That was crap.

Running out of inspiration to try to run people down are we, chump?


(16.5.06 15:23)
You'd think that with all that time on his/her hands (this much is clear) s/he could have done better.


(16.5.06 15:27)
I would Oink, its poorly constructed and pointless, really.

You'd think someone with that much time could think of a better way to spend it.


(16.5.06 15:29)
I'm thinking it's someone who hasn't quite grasped the concept of stream of consciousness. Someone whose dream is to get past page one of To The Lighthouse, but who probably failed GCSE English.


(16.5.06 15:30)
Failed? Oink, you have to be entered to fail.


(16.5.06 15:55)
So in sum, I think this entry should be entitled: "Piss-poor attempt at getting kicks from upsetting others, from a sad and talentless wanker."
ihatebloggers - can you change that, please? I'd hate for you to be misleading.


(16.5.06 15:59)
Two seconds, it appears you've given it a free upgrade to piss poor standard. What justified such high praise?


(16.5.06 16:01)
Heck, I'm just trying to be nice. Set the standard and all that.


(16.5.06 16:06)
Thats very good, leading by example, I'd say taking the high ground, but that wouldn't be difficult around these parts.


(16.5.06 16:07)
Oh now you've got me singing that song. "If I take the high road and you take the low road..."


(16.5.06 16:09)
"...and I'll get to sub standard attemts at humor before you"?


(16.5.06 16:11)
Oh stud, I'm never going to forgive your leaving the other 'u' out of humour. I'll have to knock back a stiff one tonight just to forget.


(16.5.06 16:16)
Now you've pointed it out, I shall never forgive myself. Do you often knock back a stiff one on school nights?


(16.5.06 16:17)
Only when people Americanise (Americanize?) their spellings around me. I'm quite picky.


(16.5.06 16:21)
Well, it is a fair point, I'll send you a check to pay for that drink in compensation. *coughs*


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